I'd like to kind of geek out on
y'all, if that's okay?
A
Stanford psychologist Carol
Dweck, author of Mindset:
The New Psychology of Success has
spent about two decades providing the formula (if I may) to success. She believes
each individual establishes one of two types of mindsets. You either live your
life under the contents of a "fixed mindset" or a "growth
mindset" and there seems to be a correlation between an individual's
success and their mindset.
Here's how it works.
This fascinates me! I love learning these types of things. Learning to improve one's self is always a good thing and this growth mindset philosophy is something I can definitely get behind. Dweck might really be on to something here. Almost every "Self-Help" book will tell you the same stuff. Believe in yourself, work hard, and you'll achieve. Sounds simple right? However, what if we are training ourselves and our kids to have a fixed mindset and didn't even know it?
How often do you tell your child,
"You are so smart?"
How often do you tell your child, "I know you worked hard to earn that grade, I am proud of you?"
According to this research if we only tell our children they are smart when they get the answer right, they will be quicker to give up and stop trying when they get it wrong. However, if we focus on the process and the hard work (whatever we are working towards) we make it okay to fail because failure is part of the process. "Okay you missed that last shot. What could you do differently next time? Let's try that this time and see what happens." If we teach or children to learn from their mistakes, we teach them failure isn't a negative. Instead it becomes part of their growth and they learn to embrace and learn from the failure.
Still not sold on this mindset…
Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team.
Albert Einstein didn't speak until he was 4-years-old, and his teachers said he would "never amount to much."
Walt Disney was fired from a newspaper for "lacking
imagination" and "having no original ideas."
Oprah Winfrey was demoted from her job as a news anchor because "she wasn't fit for television."
If these people had fixed mindsets they wouldn't be famous. They kept pursuing their dreams and working at their craft, and it paid off. So if you've ever failed at something know this, you aren't alone. Dust yourself off and learn from your mistake and try again. Sometimes it takes more than one try to succeed and that's okay. It's time for us to make an effort to change our approach and it's time to raise our children to have a growth mindset. Let's make an effort to focus on the hard work. If you try and fail, it just means you don't know how to do it YET. I promise you'll learn more from the journey than you would from the destination anyway!
"At the heart of what makes the “growth mindset” so
winsome, Dweck found, is that it creates a passion for learning rather than a
hunger for approval." - Maria Popova https://www.brainpickings.org/2014/01/29/carol-dweck-mindset/
I decided to bless our HR department.
I recently transferred out of HR and cannot say this enough these people are
saints. It's not an easy gig and these three girls do a great job of taking
care of our employees and the employer.
Katherine is the newest addition to the HR team and is doing better than she knows. She is smart, patient and kind. She is eager to learn and learns quickly!
Debbie is probably one of the coolest people I've ever met. She's a Harley girl and likes to ride with her family. She's the best person to talk to, she just listens and offers advice if needed/wanted but most importantly she doesn't judge. She loves people for who they are and where they are in life. She doesn't get caught up in the drama she is proud of herself and she knows her worth! I want to be more like Debbie when I grow up.
Gina is the boss and pushed me to grow. She saw my worth before I ever did. We have had our fair share of growing pains but she always knew I meant well and guided me through it. HR was a tough gig for me and my expectation didn't meet reality. Either way my time working for her gave me the courage to pursue my dream to teach and for that I will forever be thankful to her. She is kind, forgiving, and just an all-around good person. She loves well and spoils those she loves better than anyone I know. She does better than she thinks at her job and it was a pleasure working for her for three years.
I want the three of you to know I
see you, I see your hard work and I value you. You all are going to do great
things and I am proud of each of you. I hope these flowers will remind you to,
"rejoice always, pray continually,
and give thanks in all circumstances."
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